#11) Teenagers in Gloucester, Mass.

Teenage girls in Gloucester, Mass., are crazier than bat shit.

Apparently, groups of high school girls in the once-prosperous fishing town of Gloucester are getting knocked up on purpose. In droves. There were 17 pregnant students at the end of this school year according to this article in Time Magazine.

According to Time, girls were coming back repeatedly for pregnancy tests and when they got negative results, they were pissed. These 16 year old girls had some kind of hankering for self-immolation, and they were doing it by creating new human beings that would grow up depressed in the growing urban blight of Northeastern Massachusetts!

And it gets better! Several of these girls had made a pact to get pregnant and raise their babies together.

Whatever happened to best friend necklaces and photo collages? Weren't those good enough? Heck, have a big lesbian orgy. Swap clothes. Anything else! Sometimes sharing is bad!

Time goes on: "Then the story got worse. "We found out one of the fathers is a 24-year-old homeless guy," the principal says, shaking his head." [Emphasis mine.]

The city is now tasked with figuring out how it will approach giving birth control to teenage girls, although its questionable how effective that will be if they want to get pregnant.

The article continues:

"Amanda Ireland, who graduated from Gloucester High on June 8, thinks she knows why these girls wanted to get pregnant. Ireland, 18, gave birth her freshman year and says some of her now pregnant schoolmates regularly approached her in the hall, remarking how lucky she was to have a baby. "They're so excited to finally have someone to love them unconditionally," Ireland says. "I try to explain it's hard to feel loved when an infant is screaming to be fed at 3 a.m."

This may have just gotten too depressing, so we're going to end this with some advice for the other, presumably non-pregnant ladies of Gloucester, Mass.

Ladies, please. Take a moment to think about what you're doing and go study. Studying may not be cool right now, but Massachusetts has some great colleges. Aim high. Get the fuck out of Gloucester. And by all means, stay away from R Kelly.